3 + 1 = four orrs

Our journey from a family of three to a family of four through the miracle of adoption.

Interview #1 = Check!

on January 28, 2012

We had our first interview with our social worker/case manager Friday. This was a “couples” interview so we both met with her for a little over two hours. We talked about many of the things we have already addressed in our home study documents, such as our communication style, how we discipline and foresee ourselves disciplining in the future, how we plan to integrate another child into our family, what we are comfortable with accepting in terms of health conditions in the birth parent or child, prenatal drug/alcohol exposure-just basic stuff…well at least basic stuff for adoption. Thankfully it is mostly things we’ve already thought of and been discussing for several months so they were answers that came easily. Therefore, we spent our Friday morning sipping coffee (more on that later) and chatting with someone who by the end of the process will most likely know us better than most anyone else. That’s sort of crazy!

Now, about our coffee. We arrived a little early and spotted a coffee shop across the street, so we walked to what we expected would be the typical privately owned, trendy/hip, Portland coffee shop. Instead we found ourselves in a uniquely cool coffee shop. It was part of a group that works with adults who experience developmental delays. Some of the people who are part of this program/company run the shop and it is a central hang out for many others. It’s a coffee shop, why wouldn’t you want to hang out? Thus we found ourselves trying not to show our discomfort while waiting for our coffee in the middle of a game of charades, by these adults, on a beautiful sunny Friday morning. We walked away intrigued, agreed it was neat and hope the business and residential areas nearby frequent this particular shop…but it is definitely not what we were expecting and sometimes being caught off guard and thus being a little uncomfortable is just fine. In ways, it is much like our adoption journey, in can be a little comfortable, it’s a little uncertain and we are yet to see if it is what we expect (I’m going to guess right now that it is not ;)), but being uncomfortable can be a very good thing.

Confession: I have a podcast crush, I know that’s not much of a surprise to those of you who know me well. I greatly appreciate the wisdom that a guy named Randy Bohlender is sharing with others via podcast and his Saturday morning radio show. He and his family have an incredible heart for adoption. He speaks a lot of the level of respect, dignity and support that birth moms should receive. He also speaks a lot of loving children and specifically challenges those who are pro-life to consider what that means and that if you proclaim to be pro-life, but are not supportive in some way of the very women you are asking to preserve the lives of unborn children, then you are being inconsistent. He calls us to action. While that is not our “reason” for adopting, it has definitely made me think and given deeper meaning to this journey and the remarkable families we are joining in it.

I want to share Randy’s 1/21 podcast . He tackles many of the common myths about adoption, many of the things we have already heard repeatedly and have no doubt that we’ll continue to hear. They are the same things we used to think, they aren’t bad things and our hearing them is not problematic, as it’s an opportunity for us to share our experience and we love to share this experience. I encourage you to listen to what Randy has to say by clicking on this link, you don’t even have to download, you can listen right on your computer! One statement that stood out to me most is: “Adoption is not risk free, but it is worth the risk, because the privilege of raising a child is enough to say ‘let’s do this'”. That’s us! The risk of our time, our money and our hearts is worth the opportunity to have the privilege of raising the child God has already chosen for us.


2 responses to “Interview #1 = Check!

  1. Mom says:

    Thanks for the update, I loved listening to the podcast about adoption.
    I’m glad to here about the coffee shop you found, how great is that, developmental delayed adults have the opportunity to work and have a special place to meet with friends.

    We are praying that God will continue to open the doors to the child He has waiting for you.

  2. I’m bet you rocked the interview! I can’t wait to hear about VV’s interview!

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